We know, we know — Kate Middleton pregnancy rumors are like coronaviurs conspiracy memes from you Aunt Carol:
They pop up on the internet every day, and they’re almost always bogus.
But insiders say Will and Kate are definitely planning to add at least one more to their royal brod.
According to knowledgeable sources, the new little prince princess will likely arrive sooner, rather than later.
And by “knowledgable sources,” we’re referring, of course, to London bookies.
Yes, UK tabloid The Express has spoken with some blokes who make their quids and half-pence or whatever from taking bets on things like if and when Kate will have another baby.
“We think that Kate and Wills will add to their family in the future and make a fourth baby odds on to arrive at any point down the line,” bookmaker Harry Aitkenhead tells the newspaper.
But it’s not just people who spend their days handicapping cricket odds who think Kate will soon pop out another one.
Celebrity stylist Lalla Bronshtein saya Kate’s recent fashionn choices indicate that she’s already expecting.
“In recent photos of Kate, her dresses have a more loose, comfortable feel to them,” Bronshtein says.
“The peasant style dresses in particular flow beautifully, while others have a more of an Empire line,” she continues.
From there, Lalla hedges a bit, pointing out that a flowy dress or two doesn’t necessarily mean that we have a pregnant Duchess on our hands.
“Although whether she is pregnant or not is anyone’s guess but during previous pregnancies, she wore a similar style to these,” Bronshtein says.
A source tells Australian tabloid New Idea that Will and Kate set aside a lot of time for royal baby-making over the summer,
We assume it involved peasants fanning them with palm fronds suring the act and keeping them hydrated with flagons of mead afterward.
“Kate and William got to enjoy plenty of one-on-one time, too, and they had some intimate, romantic evenings all by themselves,” says the insider of the couple’s recent trip to Turro.
“It also gave them the chance to regroup and map out the rest of their summer, so they could organise their schedule around the next big priority – baby making!”
And in case you’re not satisfied with the “evidence” up to this point, The Express also spoke with a body language expert, who curiously says nothing about Kate’s body language.
“After the grim year the royal firm have had a new royal baby might be just the tonic they and the nation need,” Judi James tells the tabloid.
“Prince William and Kate have worked hard to fill the gap left by the Sussexes and a new baby would establish a sense of continuity and moving forward.”
So there you have it — the usual top-notch reportage from one a tabloid whose primary purpose is providing Londoners with something to soak up the grease from their fish and chips.
But the interesting thing is that The Express might have actually lucked into being right on this one.
Kate will likely have another child in the very near future.
But our reason for believing that has nothing to do with her dresses or her body language, and everything to do with the fact that she openly wants to have another kid.
But hey, if you can win a few schillings by placing a wager on something so obvious, have at it!