Maria Bello revealed that she is gay and in a long term relationship in an article she penned for the New York Times titled “Coming Out as a Modern Family.”
The piece was published on Friday, November 29, and the actress said the first tough decision was telling her 12-year-old son Jackson. “This was the moment I had been anticipating and dreading for months,” she wrote. “I took a deep breath, knowing that my answer, and his response, would have an impact on our lives for a very long time. I was with someone romantically and I hadn’t told him. I had become involved with a woman who was my best friend, and, as it happens, a person who is like a godmother to my son.”
Bello was previously in a relationship with TV executive Dan McDermott (he’s the father of their son), and she writes, “[Dan] will always be my partner because we share Jack. Dan is the best father and the most wonderful man I’ve known. Just because our relationship is nonsexual doesn’t make him any less of a partner. We share the same core values, including putting our son first. My more recent ex, Bryn, remains my partner because we share our activism. And Clare will always be my partner because she is also my best friend.”
Bello added that Clare started off as her friend, and after realizing that she hadn’t had the best luck with love over the years, she decided to see what could develop between the two:
“I read [my old journals] about the handful of men and the one woman I had been in romantic relationships with, passages rife with pain and angst. It seemed when I was physically attracted to someone, I would put them in the box of being my ‘soul mate’ and then be crushed when things didn’t turn out as I had hoped. As I continued to look through photos, I came across a black-and-white one of my best friend and me taken on New Year’s Eve. We looked so happy, I couldn’t help but smile. It didn’t occur to me, until that soul-searching moment in my garden, that we could perhaps choose to love each other romantically.”
So how did her family react? She writes, “My father’s response came between puffs of his cigar while we sat on the roof of a casino in Atlantic City. ‘She’s a good girl, good for you.'” Good for her — for finding love and for speaking out about it so candidly!